a sudden change of heart and mind...

so i was saying awhile ago but some stupid reasons why not to come back to my X... and hell those are absolutely the right reasons not to...

hey iv lived for a long time without anyone by my side (you know whom i referring to!) and i know that i will be fine for the coming days without making any changes in my life... why the sudden change of mind? well because im really irritated at the moment.... im really really frustrated about things i cant even name...

the thing is it actually came to me to pick up where we left of but i know for a fact that it wont work... not anymore... it seems like everything is so annoying and i cant help but to find ways to release all these...

i dont want a complicated life... though i want something better, id rather stay the same than to risk my pride...
after all things will never be the same to what they used to be... im so stupid sometimes that im caught offf guard with the fast changes of reality..

its so dumb of me to say that something is beyond forgetting because all things are ever changing.. though the future doesnt always remember and the past doesnt always forget... im not either one of them.. im krishna and i can definitely forget something if i really want to..

i know i might eat my words one day but i assure you, i will do all my best to prevent that from happening... i forgot the reason why i continue to breakaway... hell with the past...

so friends out there if you see me falling that stalker trap.. hit me hard okay so i wont dare go down that path... maybe i cant find the way to finally unchain the past but i will someday...

sounds bitter right? well lets just say this girl woke up from a dream, not horrible and not also that fantastic... and ought to find a better dream to build... its nice to relieve that moment once in a while... but that will never happen anymore... not when im aware of it...

i dont want to close my heart because of my past... its just that id rather be alone than to spend my life with someone im not even sure im ganna marry someday...

hell i care about what i see or what i feel..... those things dont matter anymore... whats important is im able to live my life the way iv planned... no distractions to detour routes... bite me!